A Fragment by Anais Nin

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Last night I wept.

I wept because the process by which I have become a woman was painful.

I wept because I was no longer a child with a child’s blind faith.

I wept because I could not believe anymore and I love to believe. I can still love passionately without believing. That means I love humanly.

I wept because from now on I will weep less.

I wept because I have lost my pain and I am not yet accustomed to its absence.

-Anais Nin

***

The last part of this excerpt felt so palpable to me.  I am living exactly that — an absence of a pain I once had.  It’s extraordinary to live through grief, and then come out of it feeling OK, feeling happy and resilient.

I wept becase I have lost my pain and I am not yet accustmed to its absence.

***

Pondering on my womynhood, time has flown by.  13 years ago I was only 12 1/2 and had little notion of what was to come.  As the years went by, I figured my life would unfold the way I had meticulously planned it.  Nothing happened how I imagined, but I’m in love with that.  I’m in love with my life and its circumstances.  I’m living it a day at a time, and it’s never felt so good to be me, here, right now.

I wept because the process by which I have become a woman was painful.

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5 thoughts on “A Fragment by Anais Nin

  1. It’s been a privilege to have been part of your life this long it’s the same reason I am beyond proud of your post and thrilled that you are in such a happy place.

    You’re writing is beautiful and empowering! Keep it coming!

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